The light dragon is long

I’ve come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog’s a bitch-ass motherfucker, he pissed on my fucking wife! That’s right, he took his hedgehog-fuckin’ quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife, and he said his dick was “this big,” and I said “that’s disgusting,” so I’m making a callout post on my Twitter.com: Shadow the Hedgehog, you’ve got a small dick, It’s the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here’s what my dong looks like! That’s right, baby, tall points, no quills, no pillows — look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong! He fucked my wife, so guess what, I’m gonna fuck the Earth! That’s right, this is what you get: my SUPER LASER PISS!! Except I’m not gonna piss on the Earth, I’m gonna go higher!! I’m pissing ON THE MOON! How do you like that, Obama?! I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT!! You have twenty-three hours before the piss drrrrroplllllllets hit the fucking Earth! Now get outta my fucking sight, before I piss on you too!

Happy one year anniversary to the video that gave us this improvised gem.

Happy 5th Anniversary, all you bitch ass motherfuckers

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phallus

Today on Discord we were like:

ALT

Result:

ALT

Make way for the yokozuna...

(Want to get in on the Discord shenanigans? See this post for more info)

I like that Zelda doesn’t seem to want to do anything to rebuild the monarchy. She’s all about the community and outlying towns, and keeping all the various kingdoms together as friends than she is about restoring Hyrule Castle. It’s even explicitly stated that the castle has fallen into ruin after the calamity, meaning she’s done nothing to try and fix it up since.

She’s the last surviving member of the Royal Family, and she spends her time traveling the countryside with Link solving everyone’s little problems and issues. She’d rather live her life in Hateno, building schools and helping children learn than uphold traditions and rules of the monarchy.

And I love that. She always hated the royal traditions with its pomp and circumstance, and she was always much freer and herself when she was out in the wild exploring and doing research.

Zelda is the breath of the wild.

no more "which are you" polls

Recreating the Master Sword from Zelda Tears of the Kingdom

(stained glass edition)